I am feeling very down again.
it has been awhile since I feel this again..

am I use to the feeling and now it suddenly gone.. that is why I am feeling lost.

I miss ____
it is not the person.
it is the comfortability.
it is the companionship.

when I explore more
I realised .. things isnt that bad

when I explore more
I realised.. no one is suitable for anyone

when I explore more
I realised.. I am tired
and hoping I can go back to the past

Human is weird.
men and women
appreciating
cherishing

are we suppose to cherish every single one in our life?
I can't
I only want that particular one

When is the last time I feel ''meaning'' in my life?
when is the last time I could hold someone's hand and totally satisfy with the feeling
when is the last time my heart was messed like hell when i gonna to meet someone i like

Escaping and Avoiding
there are repeating
I thought it is a best way to solve anything attached with emotion

I was so numb and relax in the past few months
I dun use the word - happy
coz something is missing in my life and i wont feel 100% happy without it

I dun understand
why there is a word called separation?

I hate this word.

if i never taste it, I will never know how bitter it can be.

sometimes..
I wondering
those who keep dating with different persons..
dont they feel tired?
dont they feel sad?

I am not boasting
I admit that I have dated few men after the break up
but none of them can give me the feeling I want to have
the feeling he know how to deliver

I am not comparing.
I am just so depress that when can I hold someone I love or be someone I want to be?
I just an ordinary girl.
I just want to feel loved, cared and appreciated.
from the particular one I want

It is so sad that no matter how great u look
u got an empty broken heart which is invisible
and only urself are able to feel the pain

when can I fall in love again?
I dun care am I ready or not..
I just hate to be alone

I need the hugs, kisses, attention ...

**************************************************

I am going for a long long run now.
tears into sweat.